One Night in Tugs

So Noel and I had an overnight standup gig in Tuguegarao or Tugs as I like to call it. The locals told me the short version is Tugue, but I said it sounds too much like “tule”, which is circumcision in Tagalog. Tugs is up north in the province of Cagayan in Luzon next to Ilocos, formerly and still is Marcos country.

The food highlight of our trip was the pancit batil patong. We braved a hole-in-the-wall called Jomar’s via trike. The ambience was complete with flies and a couple of kids pushing their wares on us. We didn’t buy their retail items because I suspected they were working for a sleeper cell, but we bought them two bowls of the batil patong without pork.

This noodle dish reminded me of char kway teow with some chicharon (pork skin) on top. The chicken liver was also a nice surprise at the bottom of the dish. I would go back to Tugs just for this dish.

Afterwards, we went to the only mall in the city – Brickstone Mall. Noel and I were lucky enough to catch the hourly showing of Expendables 2. Five minutes into the movie, the VCD player with projector decided to conk out on us. We demanded for a refund, but customer rights do not exist in this town. Plus the movie theatre probably wasn’t a movie theatre but a love den for the students in lust.

Going back to the hotel was exciting as we rode a kalesa. The owner charged us a whopping P300. I found out from our hotel receptionist that it should’ve just been P50. Damn that kutchero! Then again, Noel pointed out that it was still cheap considering we molested his horse.